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I'm not going to lie about this: The Simpsons is my all-time favorite show. I was just kicking back on the couch watching a while back, and on came this hilarious take on Schoolhouse Rock. Cracked me right up! So, I thought I'd watch my tape a few times, and type the lyrics to the "Amendment to be" song in. Then I checked alt.tv.simpsons, and found that it was already done for me.
If you would like to listen to the song itself, I highly recommend buying the CD from Amazon.com. It has about 40 songs from this awesome show. If you got burned on "Simpsons Sing the Blues," don't worry -- this is an excellent collection.
You can also download a snippet from this page in MP3 format.
Now, all I need is a screen shot . . .
kid: Hey! Who left all this garbage on the steps of Congress?
rolled up amendment: I'm not garbage.
I'm an amendment to be, yes an amendment to be,
and I'm hopin' that they'll ratify me.
There's a lot of flag burners who have got too much freedom.
I wanna make it legal for policemen to beat 'em,
cause there's limits to our liberties.
'Least I hope and pray that there are,
cause those liberal freaks go too far.
kid: Well why can't we just make a law against flag burning?
Amendment: Because that law would be unconstitutional.
But if we changed the Constitution...
kid: Then we could make all sorts of crazy laws!
Amendment: Now you're catching on!
Bart: What the hell is this?
Lisa: It's one of those campy 70's throwbacks that appeals to Generation-X'ers.
Bart: We need another Vietnam to thin out their ranks a little.
Kid: What if people say you're not good enough to be in the Constitution?
Then I'll crush all opposition to me,
and I'll make Ted Kennedy pay.
If he fights back, I'll say that he's gay.
Congressman: Good news, Amendment! They ratified ya! You're in the U.S. Constitution.
Amendment: Oh yeah! Door's open, boys.
Special thanks to all who helped by contributing to this page:
andy (firstname.lastname@example.org), Brian Scearce (email@example.com), and Dave G. Nelson (firstname.lastname@example.org).
Simpsons episode 3F16 was written by John Swartzwelder, and is Copyright 1996, Twentieth Century Fox Corporation.
Back to the Flag Burning Page